(some facts may have been disguised to protect my identity save my dignity save me from further embarrassment)

So, on Friday, as well as other things, I decided that I simply must head up to Regent Street and  pop in on the lovely Bravissimo ladies and get my self properly checked out – by which I mean measured (and embarrassed). After asking for an appointment and getting a swift once over from on of them to decide if my ladies were big enough to be in the shop in the first place…we got going….

Bravissimo Lady: “What size do you wear at the moment?
PJB: “Well, a 34 oranges. Although I think I need a smaller back but a 32 seems too tight.”
BL: “Just from looking at you, you’re a lot bigger than oranges. I’d say cantaloupe melons.”
PJB: *horrified*
“CANTALOUPES?!? No way”
BL: “You’re definitely a 32…possibly a 30…and I think cantaloupes or BIG cantaloupes”
PJB: “But they don’t look that big, they just look like oranges or even apples.”
BL: “You’d be surprised, let me go and get you some to try on.”

And after having to actually get them out in front of her (yes boys, really! I’m so glad I still have a bit of a tan!!)…well, I hate to say it  but she was right. I am in fact a 32 BIG cantaloupes…how wrong can you be?!

(I must say though, I’m impressed that she didn’t even need to measure, she just KNEW)

They can no longer just be boobs, or breasts, or tits…no, it’s in a whole other league. Although not big enough to have their own solar system, they’re just bigger than I’d like… I was fond of my oranges, or what I thought were oranges. 
I mean, perhaps I wouldn’t mind as much if they actually looked the size they are, but they don’t…it’s just an annoyance when trying to buy bras now, it’s not like I suddenly have glamour model worthy boobs.

So, I now have in my possession, two hugely unsexy objects that are supposed to be bras. More like hats for conjoined twins….which, I suppose is what I have.

Which one?!

1.

2.

3.*

4.

5.**

6.

* which means “love is repaid with love”

** and this means “if nothing changed, there would be no butterflies”

VOTE! GO!!

I know I had a brain fog when I was packing to come home, but I wasn’t expecting quite how crap I had actually been. Once I had unpacked all the things I had deemed important (hairdryer, straightners, make up, 5 belts, 6 pairs of shoes and 8 bags), I realised that I hadn’t really brought all that many clothes home.

4 summer dresses (which can’t be worn)
gym clothes
4 pairs of leggings
3 tops (that go with nothing)
1 pair of jeans (that don’t fit)
1 jumper
1 going out dress
2 casual dresses (which I don’t really like)

and none of them went together…..

So, after digging around in the few bits of clothes I had left here…and doing what I do best – shopping, my tiny little wardrobe is starting to look a bit more full:

Shopping is so much more fun in the UK than it is in Spain….well actually, Spain is brilliant for bags and shoes….but clothes, only if you’re a size 10 or smaller…. which I, am not. With little money, I managed a few shopping trips, although everything in the shops is a little ‘body con’ for me…having a few too many curves, it’s not really the look for me….but I have been able to find a couple of things, like this dress. Which was half price when I got to the till!

And of course, a few new pairs of shoes to keep my feet happy:

Next on my list is this dress from M&S and this one from Oasis. I do love a good dress and rarely wear anything else. I have a few parties and Birthday’s coming up so I have to have something good to wear with my new shoes….

…oh and on Friday, I get to go and see my favourite person in the whole wide world…my hairdresser!

(sorry about this post boys, I’ll make it up to you on Friday!)

Ok, for some random reason…my video wanted to give you a laugh all of it’s own and has self dubbed itself very badly, like one of those Kinder adverts. If anyone knows how to fix it, please let me know!!

Oh wait. Fixed it myself.